Dread555

I was wondering about people's opinions on what I should do with my gallery, if I should focus on certain themes and subject matter, what they would like to see, etc.

I'm asking because I'd like to get a bit more traffic going, maybe get my work more exposed and generally become more active. I've been a bit disconnected from deviantart itself, but I'll look for any excuse to get me drawing more.

For instance, If I were to start a livestream, would anyone care to attend it? I'd probably host it sometime every week, preferably around the weekend, and draw for whatever amount of time. I'd do requests for people who wanted them, play music, talk, stuff like that. Maybe I'll even draw a few of my own characters. ponies would definitely be a reoccurring theme, I have no intention to stop drawing them, but they don't have to be the only thing I draw. I do not intend to ask for any sort of commission, it doesn't feel right, and I feel charging people for anything would only  increase my own anxiety.

Aside from that, what would people care to see more of? more fanart from various franchises? comics? perhaps more expansion on my own characters? are there any art-styles from previous works that I've done that I should return to?

If anyone cares to, I'd like to know your opinions.

I found my tablet pen !

It WAS left at my school, and when we asked around for it (giving its description to people within the area where I thought I had lost it), a nice woman walked up to us and said she thinks she knows what we were looking for. She went into her office and came out with none other than my black tablet pen.

I can't describe how relieved I was to have finally found it. And to think, it was at that school for a whole week before I had realized it was gone. lol

I've lost my tablet pen...which is pretty much the only way I can draw. I haven't used pencil and paper in ages, and the thought of going back to them doesn't sit well with me.

I think I may have left it at my school, and so I'll try calling them/searching for it then, even though the last time I was there was about a week ago.

It sucks too, I was so pumped to start drawing something, only to realize NOW that my pen is missing. Drawing is one of the only forms of stress release that I have, and now that has to be put on hold.

Wanted to bump that other journal out of the way, I've been doing a little better and got sick of looking at it.

Thank you for the kind words everyone

I wanted to post this journal as an apology to some and to people I might encounter a little later...And something to explain (to a select few people) some of my recent behavior.

I have been a wreck recently, and for no good reason either. Every day my anxiety gets progressively worse, fueling consistent nightmares and panic attacks that keep me up half of the night. I used to think it was driven by the pressure of school, but since getting out of school I haven't felt any better.

It's so irrational, I have no idea where it's coming from, I shouldn't be feeling it. I live comfortably, I don't have any kind of immediate worries, and I get the love and attention of a wonderful family. Yet still I feel like I'm getting dragged under and enslaved by my own thoughts. My mind is constantly active, thinking and thinking and thinking about everything that bothers me and everything to think about or discuss, the only real time I get any rest from it is if I drown myself in mindless youtube videos or video games, but even then I sometimes lose myself to my thoughts.

Today it reached a peak, I was extremely high strung and delusional, so much so that I had to take medication to calm myself and mellow out.

Sadly, when I get like this, I take it out on other people to try and release this built up irrational frustration and irritability.

It's not like I've done anything horrible or criminal, but I've gotten like this before, some months ago, and it nearly cost me some friendships.

Just wanted to get this out there, and a formal apology to anyone I might act this way towards, I'm truly sorry.